What is a mother without her baby?

My dear friend Kelly wrote the most perfect blog.  I didn't even know what to say about this upcoming Mother's Day.  After reading this, I knew I could not write something better than what Kelly wrote.  Please check it out:  What is a Mother Without a Child? 
Something Kelly forgot to write about though, is the fact that she is the "quiet behind-the-scenes" warrior for Holden Uganda and Hope Mommies.  Pretty much anything technology-related and much of our public relations is done by Kelly.

I am spending today with the Shuffields and my sister and her family.  I look forward to writing about the weekend soon.

Raising Dough

Exhausted.  

Nearly 28 year-olds should probably be warned about waiting tables.  I once again respect wait staff even more, since it's been quite some time since I was waiting tables in college.  Quite some time ago for these feet and back and legs and...

But I could be ten times more exhausted than this and still do it all over again, all night long, for the wonderful blessing Holden Uganda had at tonight's Pizza Inn Dough Raiser.

SO many friends (I would not dare name them by name, as I would hate to leave one out) came together to work their booties off tonight.  SO MANY MORE came out to eat pizza, support and share love from their hearts.  

For the past few days, Kara and I had a fun little bet going about who would raise the most tips waiting tables.  Lauren Collier decided to join in on the fun, so it was ON between the three of us!  Kelly was our online moderator and decided to join in on the fun too! :)  Kelly ensured many online donations for the evening as well!  What an amazing time with such generous hearts.  Thank you all! 

Oh yeah.  And I won. :D  

But the REAL winners are in Uganda.  "Whatever you do for the least of these, you do for Me." ~Jesus  

The total of funds raised was over $2,600.  Our God is an Awesome God!

Other notes:  

Chet and I have never been so behind on our part of Holden Uganda (receipts, thank yous, emails).  I just want you all to know I promise you are not forgotten.  We are going to spend the next few nights completely working on HUF this week.  There are so many people to thank and write.  My heart is filled to the brim.  We are learning how to juggle our jobs, normal life, etc. while running HUF.  Thank you for your kind patience in this!

The sweet people I have "met" through Baby Center have been unbelievable this week.  Thank you all for making me feel like a Mommy.   

Mother's Day is only a few days away.  I had looked forward to this Mother's Day so much last year.  My sister even sent me a beautiful bouquet of flowers in 2010, making it my first Mother's Day gift.  I do not really even know what I am feeling this week about Mother's Day.  Sometimes it is so sad I block it out of my mind, but then sometimes I dwell on it so that I can dwell on God's goodness.  He is always good.

You know what?  Tonight was the first time I have enjoyed a game of pure fun to its fullness in 8 months.    

This year, Erin sent me a lovely and thoughtful Mother's Day gift:

Closer

Eight months away, but eight months closer to you, sweet son.

This is what Kara and I came home to, after leaving Chet with Jax (Kara's 8 month son):

It is incredibly bittersweet to me, because I know Chet is a wonderful Daddy.  My heart was melted...I had been worried to leave them alone, but Chet stopped all work and cuddled.

Tonight I thank the Lord for binding up wounds, even if the salve hurts.

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.  Psalm 147:3

New life

We were therefore buried with him through baptism into death in order that, just as Christ was raised from the dead through the glory of the Father, we too may have a new life.  Romans 6:4

Holden, 


I know you are always celebrating the HOPE of new life that Jesus has given us through salvation.  What it must be like to celebrate with the Reason for our hope!  Your Daddy and I wish you were here with us today, but we know you are in the best place of all.  All day I thanked Jesus for giving us the promise of eternal life with you, sweet baby.  It was difficult to drive by all the sweet children hunting eggs this morning, because I miss spending each special moment with you, not because I think you are missing these earthly activities.     


We live for that Glorious Day!  Happy 1st Easter son! 


I love you sweetie, 
Mommy

There has not been a time since Holden's birthday that I have been this refreshed.  Easter reminded me again what a glorious, redemptive HOPE we have because of the Cross.  I actually made it through most of today without crying...I know we will see our firstborn again, all because of the sacrifice made on the Cross.  Thank you Jesus!

We spent yesterday (Erwin Easter) at Chet's parents house.  Chet and the men in his family hauled rocks while the ladies talked and baked in the sun.  I am definitely a little too pink today, but the sun felt so nice for a change.  (I know I live in Texas where it's always sunny, but I just don't have time to get out in it at all!)  Chet's brother got a bunny for his kids, and I think I liked it as much as they did.  :)  Meet Roger:

Church was a perfect way to start our Easter this morning.  As we sang Christ is Risen, I thought about how much He has conquered death.  I know I wouldn't have made it past the first verse without crying 8 months ago.  

We had a wonderfully quiet lunch of pizza together (we may be the oddest couple, but I was would trade a stress free lunch for a fancy Easter meal any day).  Then I convinced Chet to run to Wal-Mart for some plants, flowers and mulch to get rid of the "winter dead".  6 hours later, we are sore and sunburnt (even more), but finally have a pretty front yard!

The whole time we were planting, I thought about the last time our flower bed had been changed:  We had returned home from the hospital after losing Holden to a flowerbed full of breathtakingly beautiful flowers.  Our Sunday School class truly knew how to do something incredibly meaningful; they planted new life.  I meditated about this a lot today, as I was sweating.  They worked hard to give us bright, new life in our yard.  It was very bittersweet to work on the flowerbed...Chet and I were both hit by these emotions as we worked.

Here are some photos, although I still need to work on some things. (i.e. Get new pillows for the bench one day, but I am not in a hurry, since it is really trivial in the scheme of people dying worldwide from malnutrition.)

And here's one from my iPhone of the lights working this evening:

New life is refreshing.

Thank you Jesus for your blessed promise.  Happy Easter everyone!

Atoned

See, my servant will act wisely; He will be raised and lifted up and highly exalted.  Just as there were many who were appalled at Him - His appearance was so disfigured beyond that of any human being and his form marred beyond human likeness.  Isaiah 52:13-14

That is my Jesus.  Marred beyond human likeness for me.  For all of my sin.  For all of my uncleanness.  I get a little aggravated at the cross symbol, to be honest.  It is used so casually.  I have many crosses on the walls of my house, actually.  As decor.  I pass by them each day, not even caring to think about what they symbolize.  I wear cross jewelry.

Yet, our Saviour wasn't even recognizable on that Cross.

Did He have to die?  No.

He humbled himself by becoming obedient to death - even death on a cross! Philippians 2:8


It is easy to wallow in my pride and selfishness.  I can let grief overtake my life.  I can be bitter and angry because my 8 month-old won't be celebrating Easter with us this year.  Yet, as I go into Easter week, all I can think about is how God purposefully gave His PERFECT Son to die for me.

I had heard that you cannot understand the depth of God's love until becoming a parent.  Since Holden's birthday, I have said it many times, but it especially resonates with my soul this week.  I did not fully understand the depth of His love, until I had looked into my son's face.  He sent His Son to die for us..for me...for all.  He loves us more than I can put on paper.

I am doing a study on the Holy Spirit, and have felt a strong nudge to read the Bible through again.  I have decided to start this week.  As I remember the times I read the Bible from cover to cover, I know EVERY single word points to the Cross.  It points to the reason we exist...the reason we even have a "why" to live.

I am humbled by His goodness.  We hope because of that undeserved Atonement.

What a week to thank Him for abundant life.

Christ is Risen
by Matt Maher


Let no one caught in sin remain
Inside the lie of inward shame
We fix our eyes upon the cross
And run to Him who showed great love

And bled for us
Freely You've bled for us

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Beneath the weight of all our sin
You bowed to none but Heaven's will
No scheme of Hell, no scoffer's crown
No burden great can hold You down

In strength You reign
Forever let Your church proclaim

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

O death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
The glory of God has defeated the night

Sing it, o death, where is your sting?
O hell, where is your victory?
O church, come stand in the light
Our God is not dead, He's alive, He's alive

Christ is risen from the dead
Trampling over death by death
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave

Christ is risen from the dead
We are one with Him again
Come awake, come awake
Come and rise up from the grave
Rise up from the grave