Monday, February 24, 2014

A whole lot of "date" milestones ;)

This blog covers Grey's 23 month update, Rose's 2 month update (and 2 month well-check stats from this morning)... PLUS Rose's 9 week photos.  Yes, I am turning into that mom.  Between Saturday and today we hit all those milestones, so why not. :)  I definitely don't have time to blog more than once this week.

 These photos were taken yesterday (2/23) on her second month birthday, and I absolutely love them.  Rose was a HAM and just smiling like crazy every time I said "Wreck 'Em!"  I absolutely cannot ever get enough of her crooked smile.  Swoon.  
Really though.  Is she not the cutest baby on earth?

Grey is 23 months old and certainly the biggest and best helper ever!  She is always capturing our attention and is SO full of life, energy and attitude. ;)  I am EMBARRASSED to admit that I didn't get her 23 month photos taken yet.  She is much more difficult to photograph these days.  Being a toddler means she is NOT a fan of the camera.  This blurry photo I snapped from my phone at Rose's appointment this morning sums up so much of her though.  She is silly, loves dancing, snacking and is always giving us a "new" face:
I don't know Grey's exact stats, but we weighed her last week, and she was 25 pounds!  I still cannot believe she is turning two next month.  It feels surreal.  Actually, it still feels surreal that we are even blessed with a child on earth... wow.  I am planning her sweet little birthday party, which is hard on my heart.  2?!!!!  She is wearing 18-24 month clothes, size 5 shoes and size 5 diapers.  

Grey has stepped into the big sister role so beautifully.  She and Daddy have had lots of one-on-one time lately, while Rose and I stay home more.  She has found a new love for drawing (thanks to cousins Kayson and Cohen), loves her dolls and mimics everything I do with Rose with them and her bunnies.  We are so blessed to call her our daughter.

Rose turned 2 months old yesterday and 9 weeks today.  Her 2 month well check was today, which was a bit hard on my heart.  She took the shots TERRIBLY, and just had an all-around sad time there.  (WAY unlike her!  She's normally the calmest, happiest baby on earth.  I think that is what made it SO hard on me.  I choked on tears alllll day.)  She is my little light, and seeing her sad was almost more than I could bear.

Rose's 2 month stats:
9 lbs. 14 oz. (25%)
23 inches long (75%)
15.2 inches head circumference (60%)

She is going to be tall and thin I think! :)

Rose is:
Growing like a weed!
Eating about 3.5 ounces at a time, every 2-3 hours
Wearing 3 month outfits
Wearing size 1 diapers
Truly the easiest and calmest baby there ever was
Our family's littlest bundle of joy

Every day I am amazed at how perfect Rose fits into our family.  God is more amazing than I can even think.  Every event in our lives had to fit exactly the way they happened for Rose to be an Erwin.  It's beautiful --- and beauty from ashes. 

February is coming to an end, which just blows my mind.  Our days go by so quickly.  Two makes everything crazy, but definitely so much fun.  I am still working Nerium quite a bit during the day, and Chet is still busy with work.  He's been working in Oklahoma a lot, so we are managing life without him during the week.  It's not easy (if I am honest), but I am grateful for the precious friendships I have made here in Lubbock.  Sisters in Christ encourage, teach and help.   They are HUGE to my heart and life.  Especially as a mom!

I am personally struggling to fit everything that needs to be done in each day.  I am committing to more time in the Word.  I have not been in the Word nearly enough, and my soul is hungry.  

 For the word of God is living and active, sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing to the division of soul and of spirit, of joints and of marrow, and discerning the thoughts and intentions of the heart. Hebrews 4:12

Friday, February 21, 2014

Someone turned 8 weeks!

So my blog today will be a bit different than Rose's normal weekly blog.  I will try to describe this week through a few photos.  I actually took the above photo yesterday (Thursday), not Monday.  We were in Brady from Monday through Wednesday, so the house could be PAINTED!

We arrived home to NEW paint!  I am excited to put Rose's nursery together.  Her wall color is "gray horse".  It's a green-toned gray.  I love it in person.  More nursery photos coming soon...

 On Rose's actual "8 week birthday", Rose finally got to meet her cousins Kayson and Cohen!!  We had SO much fun with the cousins.  Grey bonded over pens and markers with those boys.  Rose just enjoyed watching all the kids play.  The photo below was her "actual" 8 week photo.

 Charys snapped this photo of me and Rose (above), and I snapped the one of her and Rose (below).  Rose is just like Grey - in love with Auntie Charys. 
I feel as though this month has not even existed we have been so crazy busy.  Praising God for a day at home that I can get caught up though.  Chet has been working with Grey...I'm telling you, just one kid makes life 20 times easier.  ;)

New paint has been something we've needed since moving in.  So glad to get to do that this week, and even more fun that we spent time with the Ballems and Shuffields in Central Texas while it was being done.  Our home color we chose (for most of the home) is called Valspar Penthouse Stone.  We are having crown moulding installed next week.  I love it.
The hall (girls') bathroom is Benjamin Moore Grey Wisp (similar to RH's silver sage which was my first desire).

Our social worker visit last night was wonderful.  There is a possibility our court date will be moved up.  God is so good.

Rose's official 2 month check up is Monday (she turns 2 months on Sunday), so we will have "real" stats then, but we had to weigh and measure her for our social visit, and.... Rose weighs a whopping 10 pounds and is ... get this ... 23 inches long!  Oh my.  She is going to be so tall! 

Rose is loving life.  She is genuinely the most content little person.  I love learning from her. 

Grey has grown up so much lately.  She and Daddy attended her first Texas Tech baseball game while I threw a baby shower here last weekend.  She is holding my hand in public, which has allowed me to get out more with both kids solo.  She has really stepped into the "big sister shoes" beautifully.  I love having two girls.  Days are filled with tea parties, caring for our babies, dancing, singing and coloring.  Such a precious, fleeting time of our life.

Do not be yoked together with unbelievers. For what do righteousness and wickedness have in common.  Or what fellowship can light have with darkness.  What harmony is there between Christ and Belial?  Or what does a believer have in common with an unbeliever?  What agreement is there between the temple of God and idols?  For we are the temple of the living God.  As God has said: "I will live with them and walk among them, and I will be their God, and they will be my people."  Therfore "Come out from them and be separate, says the Lord. Touch no unclean thing, and I will receive you." 2 Corinthians 6:14-17

Tuesday, February 11, 2014

Looking Up - Hope Mommies Winter Retreat 2014

He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds. Psalm 147:3

I almost did not attend the Hope Mommies retreat this year.  With a 6 week old and a 22 month old who both need me, it was a difficult decision to leave my family for the weekend.  Really.  Who leaves a 6 week old!  Pulling away from our quiet home (aka my precious girls) in the wee hours of the morning on Friday had me in tears.  Much of my heart just wanted to call Erin and the team and tell them I wasn't coming.

I am in a different place than I was three years ago.  I can smile - even laugh - when I think of my son.  Yes, I miss him dearly each and every day, and not a single moment goes by where he leaves my heart and mind, but much of my grief is replaced with hope and joy.  Was this retreat necessary for me when I had a newborn and toddler who I was not wanting to leave?

This is all probably a lot too honest, but those were my thoughts as I pulled away from my home.

Yet again, the Lord blessed Hope Mommies with a retreat venue that was filled with His glory and beauty.  Balcones Springs is nestled in the Hill Country, and as I drove through the gate, a renewed mind and heart washed over me.  Thank you Jesus.  I was met by the faces of our leadership team and volunteers.  Many of those faces so familiar in my grief journey these past 3.5 years.  I stared at them and wondered what my life would be without them.  I knew I was supposed to be there. 

Before the women arrived on Friday evening, several of the leadership staff had a vision while we were praying about our babies all gathered together as their mommies gathered together.  What a gift from the Lord to imagine that sweetness.  I have imagined that with each retreat, and am in awe that our in the presence of Jesus as we gather.

This weekend I met many new hope mommies who shared their beautiful, hurting hearts.  I listened to their stories about their precious little ones in heaven in tears.  Lots of tears.  Remembering my life three years ago, in their shoes, it hit me how merciful God is to heal wounds. Women reached out to God through worship (our worship was led by Sandra McCracken and L.E. Taylor), reached out to others by creating Hope Boxes, carried their sister's burdens as they also bravely shared their own, and most importantly, pressed deeper into the healing and living Word of God.

If you are a new hope mommy reading my blog, please know I was in your shoes.  I was in the darkest valley, looking up to the hills and clinging to the hope of Christ, even when it was so hard to do so.  It was a joy and humbling honor to be by your sides this weekend.  Tears are flowing as I imagine what work God is going to do in you through your precious children's lives.
I wrote this blog to praise the Lord.  He alone is our healing hope.

I read Psalm 147:3 in a new light today.  The Psalm does not say He will leave big scars and a shoddy mess.  It says the Lord will bind our wounds.  Fully.  Praising God for bound wounds, and the hope of complete healing in eternity. 

Oh my sweet baby boy.  I am sure you were praising God with me, "He has done great things, we will say together, we will feast and weep no more."  Oh to spend eternity praising God together.

Monday, February 10, 2014

Rose at 7 weeks

This may be the shortest weekly blog ever, but I am a ZOMBIE.  I arrived home from the Hope Mommies Winter Retreat last night and today has been a whirlwind.  Boy oh boy did I miss my babies way too much.  I doubt I will be leaving them for two nights ever again...or at least for a few years.  The retreat was a beautiful thing, but I am in a place right now that I need to be with my babies.

At 7 weeks, Rose is:
Holding her head up almost completely on her own!
Getting so chunky. :)  I LOVE IT!  She weighed 9 lbs. today on our scale.
Still a "superstar" baby.  Sleeps and eats well, and is simply a blessing.
Wanting to be a part of everything we do.  We can't put her down or we will get lots of sad cries.  I love that she watches Grey intently all day long, and smiles and smiles at all of us.  She's a charmer.  

I know that is short, but I am in GREAT need of sleep.  I need to process the Hope Mommies weekend and blog about it too.  

 The Lord will guide you continually,
And satisfy your soul in drought,
And strengthen your bones;
You shall be like a watered garden,
And like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.
Isaiah 58:11